Third - Not Extra!

How to avoid crises in the family after the birth of a baby

Most future parents imagine the birth of a child something like this: he and she are rolling a beautiful stroller down the street, in which a smart baby is snoring peacefully. Imagine their surprise when the bag delivered from the maternity hospital begins to scream brutally. And you can force this creature to snore peacefully only at the cost of your own health!

Instead of an idyllic picture, the following is observed. The mother, exhausted by lack of sleep, her reflection in the mirror and the rolling of a beautiful stroller, in response to any remark (remark, demand) of her husband, has only one desire - to spit in his soup. And the father, exhausted by the children’s screams, the lack of sex and the sight of his brutalized wife, permanently dreams of leaving home.

Why wasn't I warned about this?! Someone should warn about this! - said one pregnant character in a recent episode of Sex and the City. We warn you: the birth of a child is a serious blow to marital happiness. Fortunately, it's temporary. How to survive this period with the least losses?

Of course, the appearance of a child in the family somehow affects the relationship of the spouses.

But if we talk about Nikolai Fomenko and Masha Golubkina, then daughter Nastya did not complicate their life at all.

What kind of difficulties are these when parents cannot be happier with their daughter?!

How to turn your husband into a great father

Your husband is not yet delighted with his new role. He does not take care of the child, because a priori he believes that the baby is your concern. The situation is unpleasant, but not hopeless.

When he takes the child in his arms, do not squeal: How are you holding him?! , Let me do it myself! Let him hold it as best he can, just not upside down. Lie and say he does amazing.

Come up with His Particularly Important Business for your husband. This could be bathing the baby or one of the evening feedings. Don't say you can't cope. Explain that only you can bathe him so that he does not cry or, surprisingly, how easily he falls asleep in your arms! A little flattery and your proud husband will gallop home.

Leave them alone. From time to time, find a reason to disappear from home (a visit to the doctor or to work) when no one, no one, except your husband, can sit with your child. Left alone with the child, the father, willy-nilly, will get used to the role of a parent. When you return and see the mess on the floor, the described bed and the dirty baby, pretend to be blind and report that he did a great job.

Find the strength to take care of yourself. It will be much more pleasant for a husband to return home to a beautiful wife than to an unkempt housewife in a greasy robe. Again, you will increase your self-esteem.

No matter what time he returns, forget how long you rehearsed the tirade: While you were wandering around somewhere, I almost died! Count to ten, exhale, smile and say: Hello, honey! The baby and I missed you so much!

Practice until you get it sincerely.

Come up with some sparkling theory like: Only men with a record high IQ know how to find a common language with babies. Let's say you just heard about it on the radio. You will be surprised, but it works on them.

WOMEN'S Tricks

Several ways to make life more beautiful

1. Stay alone for at least a few hours. Hire a babysitter or ask your grandmother to hang out with your child on the weekend. During this time, forget about washing and cleaning. Have sex, talk, watch TV. In general, feel like free people.

2. If your mother-in-law or mother-in-law helps you, do not let her become the supreme commander in your home. Some grandmothers consider the appearance of their grandchildren their finest hour - now they will be appreciated! Let grandma help, but not lead. Arrange for her shift to end when her husband returns from work.

3. Nothing gets in the way