Well, now go to bed!

I hate the word sleep
I cringe every time
When I hear
Go to bed!
It's already ten o'clock!

So wrote the unforgettable author of the anthem of the Soviet Union, who apparently also suffered in childhood from parental despotism. Over the years, the problem of putting children to bed has not lost any relevance. It is rare in any family that a child consciously, without any persuasion, goes to bed at the appropriate time. How to be?

Grandfather Spock also advised: the procedure for going to bed should be pleasant. Getting your child ready for bed should be fun, but adamant, so that he does not allow the thought of another evening program. It’s good, Spock believes, if the parents occasionally allow themselves to be persuaded and put him to bed later - for example, on New Year’s Day. On ordinary days, you need to adhere to the established routine once and for all. Small children calm down well if going to bed is preceded by a certain ritual: say, first they put the bear to bed, then the doll, and then the mother puts the baby in the crib, kisses him good night, turns off the light and leaves. All this needs to be done slowly, the procedure for going to bed should be very peaceful.

However, many parents, having listened to such advice, can only grin skeptically. In practice, good intentions often turn into a nightly nightmare. For me it lasted about an hour and a half, interspersed with spankings and kisses. For some reason, just before bedtime, the children reached their peak of activity, and they, who just half an hour ago had been peacefully playing with cars or construction sets, began to rush around the apartment like crazy to the war cries of the Apaches and the firing of pistols. All my peaceful attempts to calm them down and put them to sleep were perceived incorrectly: the children believed that since I did not scold them, it meant that I approved of them, and therefore practically did not react. For half an hour I vainly caught first one and then the other. Finally, we managed to wash them, change them, and get them into bed. Wow! Finally, you can calmly read a book. But it was not there. They started going to the toilet, quiet conversations and even singing, as well as requests to drink some water. I slowly began to boil and after the next verse I flew into the room shouting: Another sound - don’t expect mercy! Of course, no one was particularly afraid of me, but still the singing and talking died down and the children fell asleep.

The more I read the relevant pedagogical literature, the more despair I fell into. Getting ready for bed, notes Canadian psychologist Barbara Colorozo, shapes the child’s mental and physical health, which generally gives the individual independence and is the basis of a healthy lifestyle. The very time of going to bed, the psychologist believes, can become long-awaited and magical due to reading or retelling fairy tales and stories. Before going to bed, you can tell not only fairy tales, but also introduce children to the history of the family, country, planet, and discuss the problems that have accumulated during the day. I also tried to read books and discuss problems with the children whenever possible, but for some reason, it was after sitting with a book that they most wanted to run.

The husband revealed the secret. Once I went on a business trip and asked my mother-in-law to stay with us during my absence. So, oddly enough, she managed to put my boys to bed on time and without unnecessary noise.

“I watched on purpose,” the husband explained. “You leave them to their own devices all the time.” Even when you read a book to them, you still strive to do it quickly and go about your business. Our mother is not busy and therefore the whole evening is occupied only with them. He does his homework with the older one, builds a house with the younger one using a construction set, and then reads a book to both of them. At the same time, it is clear that she herself is very interested in all this. In addition, she does not twitch or raise her voice. When he sees that they are starting to get overexcited, he turns off the TV and bright lights, and when he changes them and puts them to bed, he keeps telling them a story all the time.